[9:29am]
Here I am, sitting in the good 'ol ITA (Infusion Treatment Area). It makes me feel like I've come full circle: Cancer Center (Stanford V) -> Hospital (ICE) -> Cancer Center (Pre-BMT) -> Hospital (BMT). But that's really not the case -- it's just the next part of a new phase.
But I'm fine with that. Well, not entirely. It's really hard not to get overwhelmed by all of this; it takes strength just to get up and do stuff. I'm sure that will change in a week or so, but it's hard to think about the future when you feel the present so much.
Yesterday, my mom and I got established in our new little apartment. It's a compact place with all the standard necessities that you'd find in a small studio (except that the bedroom has two twin beds).
It is a wonderful, wonderful thing to walk from one room to another! A bed in one room, and your computer in another -- how profound! There's room to pace! I am not confined! The only problem is that the bathroom has that "hospital smell" that I've learned to despise. They must use the same cleaners or something; I need to get an air freshener.
Sleep's been really, really difficult. I have this hot/cold problem that I've just started to figure out. The problem starts like this: I am cold, so I move and adjust the blanket to cover me more. After a few seconds, this new adjustment has me way too hot, so I pull the blanket away. Rinse; Repeat.
I believe this is because I am so pathetically out of shape. If I get up to do anything, I break a sweat and get hot. This is why I spent most of my time in the hospital shirtless -- otherwise I'd keep removing my shirt and putting it back on... a blanket it quicker.
Anyhow, so my "thermal core" overheats when I do pretty much anything -- including a simple blanket adjustment. This is why I go from cold to hot so quickly.
So, my new sleep strategy is two-fold: 1>Take Ambien, and 2> Make all blanket adjustments very slowly, and with a minimal amount of effort. It takes practice.
Perhaps the best strategy is just to exercise more.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
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3 comments:
Pacing never felt so good, huh?
Glad to hear that you are getting settled into your new routine. Every day will bring increased strength and stamina.
What a wonderful way to enter the holiday season.
So, you didn't say what procedure you were getting at the ITA. Obviously not chemo. Not IV nutrition, I assume.
My mild cold is becoming a mild cough. I really wish I could come up there and see you feeling better, but that will have to wait until I am not a menace to your baby immune system.
The temperature thing is quite common post-SCT - can't remember what it is that causes it, but it does pass.
And the weakness passes incredibly quickly too - just 10 days after Wullie's release he drove himself to our closest town and went shopping!!!
Enjoy your freedom............Vx
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