[12:32pm]
Yesterday, my hemoglobin was at 9.4. Today, who knows? One thing I do know is that I am totally tired and winded. I would boycott moving if I could.
Yesterday, when I got home, I slept, read a little, slept some more, and here I am. Sleep is good.
You know, they say anemia can effect concentration? That could explain a lot. Wait, what was I saying?
Anyhow, I got up this morning with a really weird feeling in my stomach. It was like I needed to eat something, but more dire and weirder feeling. After eating something, and taking my pills, it took an enormous amount of effort to keep everything down. I remember moving very slowly toward my ativan...
I guess I'm a bit more sensitive than I once was... and I'll definitely have to take my pills one at a time in the future.
Then I began my Neupogen injections. It is a very strange feeling to stab oneself. I think it is instinctual...
Well, it seems clear that Cytoxan has kicked my ass the most so far. Beats ICE and Stanford V. Perhaps a taste of what is to come? Now to go back to sleep.
[2:13pm]
After blissful slumber, I awoke with my stomach in knots. This is definitely hunger, but what to eat? I look across the kitchen cabinets and the more I think about food, the more my stomach shifts to nausea. Ok, food later, get a few anti-nausea pills in. The thought of pills makes it worse. My strategy: let an Ativan dissolve in the mouth, then take the other two anti-emetics.
After settling down for a few minutes, I allow my mind to reconsider the possibility of food. Nope... nothing seems to work. Except... my long-time food savior: the bagel. So, I toasted up a bagel with cream cheese and my stomach stopped acting up. I'm going to *live* off these suckers for a while!
Now that my stomach is a little happier, I can work on that 3 liters of water I need to drink today.
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
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5 comments:
I just got over my last ass kicking round of Cytoxan. Blech! The hardest part is forcing yourself to eat and drink which I think really does help the nausea in the end... When I can't concentrate enough to read or watch movies, but can't muster the energy to get out of bed, I like to listen to This American Life (I have the archives on my computer) because you can just drift in and out to Ira Glass' comforting voice...
I know!! Wow, I was just about to append today's entry about that! The American Life... I'll have to look into that. Congrats on beating the Cytoxan.
Hope you have a good and cough-free sleep. :)
Audiobooks seem like a good suggestion. Austin, we have dozens of lectures on various interesting subjects. Look on my computer on the J: drive under "nonfiction audiobooks". Music is also good. My set of complete Beethoven is on my S: drive. Also Mahler.
Before reading your comment, I had already bought more plain bagels. I also got more potatoes. A fully cooked baked potato is very easy on the stomach. And, I know you don't like hot cereal, but it is excellent too. We have oat bran.
No doubt part of your stomach problems is hunger. You are eating only a quarter or so of your normal amount and you're not used to that. Also strange, my old problem of stomach ulcers picked this moment to recur. In the 80's I had a duodenal ulcer which eventually healed, but it seems to be back. Stress and sympathetic gastric distress perhaps. I am taking famotidine for it. I guess I will need gentle food too. Some new research associates duodenal ulcers with type-O blood. You have O type too, so be kind to your stomach. Duodenal ulcers are usually not as bad as peptic ulcers.
You need a container which holds 3 liters for your water. I just bought you 2 gallons of distilled water. If plain water tastes dull, you will find a squeeze bulb of lemon juice in the refrigerator. A few drops in the water will make it more pleasant.
It's hard to hear your having such a hard time (but not so hard that you shouldn't say it!!!!!) Just that I wish you weren't. Want you to know I'm tuned in to you and as we have Kristina in catacism and Mike and I have to take 52 weeks of adult religious education, my family is working on praying, so I can say, your in our prayers.
Oh, also, Pepere has access to audiobooks through hospice, for free. They give him a catalog to order through and everything, its like a library. He could probably check some out for you (given the computer reference - I don't really know how they work but if he could send it that way, it would make sense. If not maybe there is something like that through your healthcare.(s)
Love you,
Vikki
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